Comedian Actor Writer Host Big Mouth

Dear Ted Cruz...

By Judy Gold

How are you? It must be so exhausting running for President. I hope you’re taking good care of yourself.

I happened to be flipping through the channels on Thursday night when I saw you talking to Donald Trump at the Republican debate about what you called “New York values.” I wasn’t sure at first what you meant, but then you explained: “I think most people know exactly what New York values are: socially liberal, pro-gay marriage, pro-abortion, focused on money and the media.”